Possibly my favorite part of all of this was our Showcase Celebration at my last school (which feels really weird to say, because I haven't totally accepted that I won't be back there in the fall). Showcase is an opportunity for the students to perform for an audience of their parents, teachers, family members and friends. They usually pick pieces that they have been competing with at tournaments during the year, and we also included two sample debate rounds. Since I am actually incredibly disorganized (for a teacher) I wasn't sure we could pull it off, but my debate girls did an amazing job!
I used Oglethorpe's free printing services to print some programs with a letter to the parents and faculty at my school on the back, and ordered a BIG sheet cake from Publix...which they subsequently misspelled "speech" on, but it worked out for the best since I was able to get my money back because of their mistake. #FreeCake #BrokeCollegeStudentProblems
It still tasted good.
We drove from Atlanta to Tifton on Monday morning and stopped in Macon for the cake. That drive is a bear, about three hours total. Georgia is a really long state. We ran through a quick dress rehearsal, where everyone was prepared and there were zero hiccups whatsoever.
HAHA. Not. Dress rehearsal was complete with rowdy seniors next door raising all hell, and one student with chronic anxiety having multiple minor panic attacks. This is the stuff I live for as a teacher. Not that I enjoy students suffering from things like stage fright and anxiety, but because the students who come to me with these issues are some of my favorites (teachers do have favorites, you know). I love watching these kids blossom, because while it is always nice to get a star debater, straight-A honor roll kid in your class or on your team, nothing beats watching a child who never believed in her own potential surprise herself in front of an audience of forty or fifty adults. The expression on their faces is priceless when that happens. Those are my favorite moments.
So I spent all afternoon rehearsing with this student and sat in the front row with my fingers crossed as she delivered her speech with flying colors. All my girls did an incredible job, and their parents and my administrators were super impressed with their work. It made me so proud of my kids, and really proud of my work. Even though we did not have a totally stellar season this year, showcase really highlighted for me how far everyone has come.
Then I got to spend a good half of the car ride back to Macon sobbing my eyes out over leaving. This work breaks you in the best way possible, because you're really sending a little piece of your heart out with each student you've had in the past. I am not a sappy person, or even a very maternally-minded person, but I do love my students, would do pretty much anything to ensure their safety, happiness, and success, so it definitely hurts to leave.
My lovely debate ladies after showcase. So smart, and so talented!
Before I knew it, it was time for graduation, which definitely felt surreal. My parents came on Friday morning for baccalaureate, and I decorated my cap Saturday morning for graduation. I decided on a tribute to my Granny, who passed away this semester, and played a big role in my development as a student and teacher. She encouraged me from a really young age to pursue college, and I know she would have been so proud to see me walk across that stage. She was a teacher for several years as a young woman, and a lifelong teacher of her children and grandchildren.
I used pieces from one of her Scrabble games to spell out a special message tribute for her, and wrote "Teach Truth" along the sides, which is a play on my debate mantra, which is "Speak Truth." I am so happy with how it turned out!
Getting to celebrate with my family was wonderful, and having my degree in my hand felt so amazing! I have worked really hard to pay my way through college and try to minimize my student loan debt, so it was a huge relief to finally be done. Even though being a college graduate is just expected in a lot of families or areas of the country, I don't think that is necessarily an expectation around here. Thankfully, my parents and grandparents have really pushed me to do this and helped me along the way as much as possible, and I'm so grateful for them.
Now that I've been home for about a week, I've been out shopping for lots of business casual and business profesh clothes, and I finally got signed up to take my English Praxis, which I have to pass in June to be certified. I've gone through my personal library at home to pull books for my classroom library, as well as doing some thrift store book shopping. I spent a good three hours yesterday taping the edges and spines of all my paperbacks with clear packing tape to make them last longer. I leave exactly a week from today, and I am a little freaked out about it! A lot of it is just stress about everything I need to organize and do before I leave, and obviously I am dreading being away from my fiance, Don, but it's just another speed hump we have to get over before we FINALLY get to meet each other in that chapel next summer.
So many people have been positive about my upcoming experience in Mississippi. Everyone from my amazing high school debate coach, Ms. Z, to my future inlaws have been so encouraging and uplifting during this transition. My family members and friends have given me some incredibly generous graduation gifts to help financially with my move, as well as beautiful cookbooks (you know, so I can actually be a vegetarian and survive in the rural South), supplies for my classroom, and teacher swag. Seeing how excited most people around me are makes me really excited, too! During moments of weakness or doubt, I know I'll think back to all this love I've been feeling this summer and feel confident in my abilities thanks to everyone who's cheering me on. I love ya'll.
There have also been a couple of haters, which is par for the course when you're as successful and fabulous as I am (just saying).
It has been really interesting to hear people's inherently racist attitudes come out during this whole process. I have actually had someone ask me if most of my students are going to be "special ed." Sorry, predominantly poor, predominantly African American students do not equate to "special ed." I've had people ask questions about whether or not I fear for my safety. Really? Come on.
I am also starting to experience those awesome situations all my education professors warned me about, where people who have zero experience teaching suddenly become experts when they find out you're going to be a teacher. Especially a Teach For America teacher. Especially a Teach For America teacher in Mississippi.
So for the curious and the self-acknowledged experts, here's a quick FAQ:
(1) Are you crazy?
Disregarding the fact that you are probably using the word "crazy" in a really disrespectful and inaccurate way, the answer is no, I am not crazy. I am actually a grown up who has weighed the pros and cons of this decision very carefully, and decided that this is the best fit for me right now. Thank you for your concern about my sanity.
(2) What's your salary like?
Disregarding the fact that you are super rude, my salary will be between $30,000-$35,000 annually. Cut the crap, if I was in it for the money, I'd be in a different career.
(3) What's your fiance going to do?
Probably like, go to his classes and do the extracurriculars that he does? But since the real question you're asking is "Does Don support your decision," the answer is yes, wholeheartedly. Disregarding that your question is nosy, rude, and sexist, he has been wonderful about everything and we are not intimidated by the distance. Not saying it will be fun, but when you've been together as long as we have, you should realize that distance means so little when someone means so much.
(4) Are your kids going to be stupid/bad/other negative words?
The majority of my students have committed one crime in society's eyes, and that was to be born into abject poverty. Does that answer your question? And while we're at it, let's get another thing straight: nobody talks bad about my kids or my community without going on my crap list forever. For all intensive purposes, just start considering me a proud Mississippian.
(5) Why in the world would you want to leave your family/Williamson County/Tennessee?
Because I have a purpose in this world, and some God-given talents with which to fulfill that purpose, and right now I have a role to fill in Mississippi.
Any more questions?
-Love, Linds
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